"It takes some fears to make you trust. It takes those tears to make it rust. It takes the dust to have it polished." - Jason Mraz

"That night we talked about life, about our times together.
Maybe we weren't the same two kids we had once been.
But some things never change.
Some things last.
And even though I didn't know what was going to happen to us,
or where we were going...
I just knew I couldn't let [him] out of my life."
- Wonder Years

Today is one of my favorite days of the year. Nothing actually happens on this date, but the significance behind the date makes it oh so special for me. Around this time every year, I get to reassess everything and realize how lucky I have been.

Three years ago, my best friend and I were having a lot of complications in our relationship. We were never on the same page and we rarely talked. When we did talk, we would always fight and make up, only to have the same thing happen again the next month. After a few months of this frustrating never-ending cycle, we ended up having to take a "break" from each other. I know this sounds weird, because what kind of friends take breaks from each other? Well, we did, and we went almost a whole month of no communication. That month was a difficult time in my life; there wasn't anyone who I could really turn to, because the only person that I would turn to was the one who initiated this separation. I went on day after day, wondering when I was going to get my best friend back, and it was especially hard when we had some of the same classes together.

However, three years ago on this date, my best friend simply said "I'm sorry for everything", and those four words ended up changing my world around. After weeks of not talking, we finally teared down the walls that kept us apart for so long. We ended up talking for hours about our relationship. It was one of the most heartfelt conversations I have ever had with another person, and I turned out to be the first person my best friend has ever said "I love you" to and actually meant it.

"And it takes no time to fall in love,
But it takes you years to know what love is.
It takes some fears to make you trust.
It takes those tears to make it rust.
It takes the dust to have it polished.
Life is wonderful."
- Jason Mraz

Ever since then, we both have worked really hard to maintain the strong bond that we have together. Sure, we have fallen down the wrong path a couple of times after this but we never forgot about that conversation and that kept us together. That is why every February 22nd after that, I look back and think about all the wonderful memories that we have created since then. The big events included Disney World, concerts, and New York City, and the little moments made it what it's worth. Taking night trips to Dairy Queen, cheering on each other at our sporting events, random hang out sessions, sharing new music, school events, etc. But the one moment I hold most dear was being able to walk with my best friend at graduation. Having my best friend there with me at the biggest milestone of my life to date, after putting up with me through the past three years and sticking by all my decisions, regardless of whether they were good or bad, was so amazing.

"Well I'll never be something I'm not.
Please don't throw away what we've got.
'Cause we've been together for way too long,
I was playing around but I'm coming home.
You know that I love you.
There's no one above you.
I said it the last time, but this is the last time.
Don't make me over, 'cause I can be faithful.
You're my number one."
- John Legend

"At the end of the day, when it comes down to it,

"The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows" - Brand New

Below is a Facebook note that I published on February 4, 2009. It contains 25 things that my friends may not have known about me until then. I recently decided to delete it because I realize it may have been a little too personal for me; however, this is the perfect place to post it so I can look back at it years later. It's also funny to see how much things have/haven't changed since February 4th.


"25 Random Things

1. Even though we get into arguments a lot, I love my parents so much and I'm so thankful for all that they have done for me. Most of the time, I get what I want, and they usually do it with no complaints. However, I can't recall the last time my parents told me that they love me. Maybe I just can't remember, because I obviously know that they do through their actions every day, but it would just be nice to hear it once in a while.

2. Although we're competitive, I'm proud of how smart my brother is. I love him and I'm going to miss him a LOT next year.

3. Knowing that everyone is going his/her own way next year, I don't let things phase me anymore. I don't let people's actions define who I am. I am trying really hard to not care what other people say or think. I am just really looking forward to getting out there, meeting new people, and just exploring.

4. Despite all my accomplishments in school, I never feel like I'm doing enough for my parents and myself, and sometimes, I wish that could be enough.

5. I can't imagine what it would be like to sit back, relax, and let someone else take the reins. I always feel the need to be involved, which is why I am involved in everything, which drives me crazy sometimes...

6. I've always been able to have a close connection with my teachers and administrators, and I couldn't imagine going through a school day any other way.

7. That said, I love going to a school where everyone knows my name, and vice versa. I love having the power to make certain decisions, and I love having the opportunities to represent the students in three different ways. I love my fellow class officers and how well we cooperate with one another and I'm so proud of all that we've accomplished! It's hard for me to grasp the concept that I will going to a school with at least 2,000 people... never mind, 22,000 people.

8. I'm afraid that I will never reach the level of my parents' success. My parents' success is definitely not the kind that the typical American would consider as "success", but in a way, they have accomplished something that I don't think most people would be able to do nowadays... inevitably because of the economic crisis.

9. I love having friends from other towns who I rarely get to see. The distance just makes everything more fun whenever we talk or see each other. I also love that I can nice conversations with them and know that they know exactly what I'm talking about, despite the fact that we're from different towns.

10. My four guy best friends are some of the very best people I've ever met. I can always rely on them to make me smile and laugh, and 99% of the time, I think I would rather hang out with them than do anything girl-related. Thank you RPV TLK MCL and BBM for always being there for me :)
(Having said this, I really miss the days when my other guy best friends were CWD, RWC², and SML and when we used to hang out all the time; love you guys forever)

11. In my opinion, I think AP U.S. History is the second difficult class I've ever taken. I always contemplated switching down to level one (even now), but I would rather struggle in that class than to have people disappointed in me.

12. I never had that one best friend when I was growing up. I wish I did.

13. I hate how I can remember the most pointless and stupidest things EVER, and not more important things, like information for an anatomy or history test... it drives me up the wall.

14. I'm ashamed that I don't embrace my heritage and be open about it more. However, I don't feel like my friends would understand it, or even want to understand it, so I just never talk about it.

15. I've been playing the piano for ten years. I still don't feel like I have accomplished anything yet, and I don't think I ever will. I can only play one song from memory, and I wish I could change that so badly.

16. My best friend and I don't have the same friendship like almost all the other best friends out there. A few days will go by when we don't get the chance to talk to each other, and we usually don't hang out. Regardless, I am SO grateful for the friendship that we do have, despite all the ups and downs that we have gone through. The rare times that we've had are some of my most favorite memories of all, and I simply cannot imagine having anyone else as my very best friend.

17. In all of the summers that I've had in my short life, the summer of 2006 was the best of all. I don't think there's a day that goes by that I don't think about the people I've met and the experiences that I've gotten out of it.

18. I don't think that most people would consider their boss to be their hero, but the person that I technically work for IS my hero. He is more of a friend to me than anything, and I love how genuine and caring he is to not only me, but everyone around hm. All I want to do is make him proud, and I hope that I can grow up to be the same person that has had such an impact on me.

19. A hug is the simplest gift that anyone could ever give to me, and sometimes, that would mean more to me than anything that could be purchased. I honestly mean that.

20. Out of all the friends that I have made, there's only one friendship that I wish I hadn't let slip away and one friendship that I wish I could rebuild to the maximum potential that it used to be... only a year ago.

21. The idea of just having the opportunity to attend a UConn Huskies basketball game, and wearing that navy blue and white, makes me so happy and excited inside. But who knows...

22. I live up to the "good girl" image. Last week, I recited a poem about a girl who just wanted to branch out and be a "bad woman" like all the other girls in her neighborhood, and my teacher said how ironic it was that I chose that poem since I'm not a "bad girl"... One day, I would want for everyone to stop thinking of me that way. I'm not saying that I want to be bad... but even so, I just wish people will be less surprised when I do something that's against the rulebook... i.e. when I skip a day of school instead of having a legitimate reason to stay home... really...

23. I love/miss every second of gym class when I got to be a gym warrior (especially in Ultimate Frisbee). Sixth period sophomore year & fourth period senior year will ALWAYS be my favorite classes ever :)

24. There is never a dull moment when I am hanging out with my girl friends. I love the fact that we're all so alike and so different at the same time, and I just love them all. (especially my G, because we think everything is funny, no matter how cheesy it is, and I love that about us :))

25. I am completely dreading the end of this summer... it bothers me beyond belief to know that the end of the summer is going to be here very soon..."

"And even though we all can still do more, there's so much to be thankful for" - Josh Groban

The countdown officially begins, since there are only 7 days left until Thanksgiving break starts, and only 9 days until the holiday! I thought this week was going to go by so slowly (and maybe it's too early to tell) but it's going by pretty quickly in my opinion. I have no more exams to study for and one 4-page paper to write until break, so I am very relieved!

Since it is Thanksgiving season and all, I am thankful for many things:

[Family]
I am thankful for having two wonderful parents, who always put their children's needs in front of themselves. I can be a (spoiled) brat sometimes, but they always make sure I am content and will do whatever it takes. I'm thankful for their ridiculous hard work, dedication, and love... not to mention their willingness to pick me up from school at any time. I am also thankful for my brother (although we act like we hate each other half the time) and I am so proud of how smart he is.

[Abington friends]
Regardless of the distances between us, I know I can always turn to them for a good laugh or time. They all have helped shape me into the person I am today and I would be nothing without them!


[Salve friends]
They have helped me feel comfortable here when I wasn't so sure at first. I love our Monday television nights and the fact that we can laugh at each other for no reason at all.

[PCC friends]

They have given me the best laughs, the best times, and the best memories. I am relieved that a lot of us have managed to stay in touch over the years, and I will always believe that Abington & Middleboro were destined to be one town!

[co-workers]

They are 50 of the craziest, funniest, and friendliest people I have ever met. I had the best summer, thanks to them, and I always look forward to our reunions!

[#1 best friend]

I am thankful for his compassion, kindness, thoughtfulness, and especially for the way he believes in me.

[Panera Bread (not kidding)]
I am thankful for their You-Pick-Two deals (half broccoli cheddar soup, half caesar salad), $0.99 Chocolate Chipper cookie, Cinnamon Crunch bagels, and lemonade. Whether I'm at school or home, I am thankful that there is always at least one Panera that is 15 minutes or less away.

[AHS Track & Field]
I am thankful for the dedication and self-esteem that I gained from being a runner. I am actually thankful that I was forced to be a 400m runner last year, because it pushed me to believe in myself (thank you, Mr. Lanner & Mr. Duggan).

[Jason Mraz & John Mayer (and music in general)]
When the rest of the world fails me, these are the two men that I turn to. I am thankful for the "We Sing. We Dance. We Steal Things" and "Continuum" albums. I am thankful that they are two absolute geniuses. I am thankful for music for being a wonderful foundation for friendship. I am thankful that I am a musician.

[Salve Regina University]
I am thankful for Salve Regina for providing me with a college education. I am thankful for their overwhelming generosity in financial aid, and I am thankful (and proud) that I am a first-generation college student.

[James Lafferty & One Tree Hill]
You know where to find me on a Monday night at 8PM... parked in front of the television, drooling over the hotness that is James Lafferty/Nathan Scott. I am an avid fan of One Tree Hill (I've seen every episode aired since the pilot episode in September 2004!) and I like to think I can vicariously live through their more-than-necessary drama...

And of course, I am thankful for good health and all that jazz, but here are a few other miscellaneous things...

- Hooded sweatshirts
- Jim & Pam's romance on The Office
- Pandora Radio
- the shuffle option on iTunes
- FML.com
- Disney movies
- New England weather (most of the time)
- LIFE!! <3

"Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough" - Oprah Winfrey